It's humorous to me that I suck so bad at blogging because I read so many people's blogs regularly.
I keep up with Ross Training Blog, MovNat, InvisibleShoe.com, Will Haas Blog, Trail Hacker, In Search of Solid Ground, THOR, Jason Robillard's Teaching: Let's Roll Up Our Sleeves, Shoeless Shel Bell, and last and possibly least The Science of Sport. On top of all those I regularly read Fox News headlines, I'm taking online classes at Bellevue University, and I keep up with friends and family on Facebook. But, for no apparent reason, I cannot make time to sit and type or write up (I just opened my written journal the other day and it was just as outdated as this blog) what I think or feel at any one time.
Just an update on life...
I last wrote while I was overseas deployed, well that time passed more or less uneventfully. I had a terrible time, but the problems were centered around the fact that I wasn't doing what I've been trained to do. And when I tried to change things for the better I only encountered resistance. Well, that time came and went, then I went home (right now I'm writing while back in Mississippi for re-training) and had a great 5 months, or so, among family and friends. The only downside to my time back home was my attempt at applying for the Airmen Education and Commissioning Program (Air Force program to go to school full time and graduate/get a commission) failed; partly because of bureaucratic red tape and partly because Ohio State University wasn't able to process my application fast enough.
After that failed I volunteered to deploy early (I was told I had to deploy again with this program) in order to get back home before the end of summer. Last year I didn't get home until mid-October and I missed all of the fun summer months, so I wanted to go earlier so that I'd get home sooner. Well, while I was going around doing paperwork for leaving I talked with out unit's language program manager and he said there was an advanced language class this fall out at the language institute in Monterey, CA. Well, since that's what I want to do any ways and the class didn't start until Nov and I thought I'd be back in late September, I signed up for it. Well, long story short I found out later that my deployment this time is LONGER than last time and I won't be back till late October. Regardless, I put in the application knowing that if I was accepted into the class they would cut my deployment short so I could get back in time for the class.
So here I am in Mississippi, my application for that language course was denied, but I am supposed to move to Japan as soon as this deployment and more training is done. There are so many things not working out the way I want them and it makes life kind of... suck, for lack of a more all-encompassing word. I am excited about the prospect of moving to Japan. So much so that I'm trying learn Japanese, studying the area and doing everything I can to be well prepared to move there. Unfortunately, this deployment is still looming over my head and I have to complete this stage of life before I can move on.
Of course it's not that simple... I can't move on to the deployment without completing this retraining. Which, by the way, I am not doing very well. I didn't like this program while I was deployed last year and many of the people who were hard to deal with last year are now training the new people and people like me going back out. So, there are personality conflicts as well as people trying to "climb the corporate ladder" (it's slightly different in the military but it still exists) and those people aren't afraid to kick those below them off. So it seems like I'm getting blackballed a little (perhaps not on purpose). On top of getting treated differently (at least it feels like I'm treated differently), I'm inexperienced in much of how we're supposed to do this job. Like I said before my problem with my previous deployment was that we didn't do the job we were trained for... Well, if I didn't do the job while I was out there (deployed), and last year when I went through this training it was totally new training, and the program wasn't very well established and the training wasn't very good; obviously I'm NOT as experienced as I should be.
So here I am failing at life *again, and every day I'm delayed here tacks another day on to the end of my deployment. So, even though I volunteered to go early to get back early it's going to end up that I left only a week earlier and I'm going to get back two weeks later than last year. The ONLY thing (other than God) that's going to get me through this deployment is the looking forward to moving to Japan!